New Zealand

Photos from top left, clockwise: I prepare to jump out of a plane; James walks across one of the many deserted beaches in the Coromandel Peninsula;James looks out over New Zealand´s Central Plateau mid-way through the Tongariro crossing; Mount Tongariro.

So, how many cliches of the New Zealand holiday maker have we managed to tick off over our three week stay? Hire a car and marvel at the jaw-dropping scenery – done. Do some Middle Earth tourism and walk across the craters and plateaus of the Tongariro Alpine Crossing, AKA Mount Doom – still aching after two days, three months of idleness has clearly taken its toll on the fitness levels... Throw self out of a plane over Lake Taupo, NZ's largest lake – yes!

So far, so Lonely Planet... but there's been a lot more. Spend Christmas with a family we met in our first few weeks away, whilst aboard a boat trip to Halong Bay, Vietnam – we send huge thanks and best wishes to Bryan, Jacqui and Lyle Patterson, who adopted us for the Christmas period. Beers in the sunshine, several games of Monopoly (NZ edition of course), and more pavlova than one would think it humanly possible to consume made the 25th December a proper Kiwi Christmas.

So although we haven't made it to the South Island, we hope that our more well-travelled friends will spare us too much of a verbal haranguing, as it's been a pretty packed 20 days. Having spent a few days in Auckland taking in the sights, we met Bryan and Jacqui to head south to their town of Tauranga. After a relaxing weekend getting to know the dogs, we picked up the first of our hire cars from the wonderfully-named Rent-A-Dent: an achingly cool Nissan Bluebird – check out that walnut dash! We travelled north into the Coromandel Penninsula, winding our way through the mountains and walking on deserted beaches. We continued our research into New Zealand beers and stayed in possibly the nicest backpackers' ever, the delightful Tui Lodge. We also took our tranquil state of mind up a stage by staying in a Buddhist retreat for a night, meeting lots of alternative types from all over the world, including a Californian Buddhist nun. Meditation and simple, vegetarian food left us serene and discussing how to transcend our egoic selves – then we got back to lovely Tui Lodge and had a massive barbeque and some beers.

We got back to the Pattersons on Christmas Eve and settled down to enjoy Christmas in the sunshine. Owners of a small landholding (ok, pretty huge by UK standards), the Patterson family includes dogs Sting, an elderly Jack Russell, and Turc, a Flanders Cattledog who is similar in appearance to a small bear; also five sheep and three hens. Apart from the dogs, the animals earn their keep through their eggs and meat – home-reared lamb is something else – and the peacock who was foolish enough to wander across the Patterson homestead took a bullet in the head and took pride of place in the Christmas Day feast. A more traditional aspect of the Kiwi Christmas dinner is the pavlova, served with cream and strawberries – and proceeded to eat more than was safe for the arteries. You know who it was who flew the flag for the Brits on that one...

We Rented Another Dent from the 27th, picking up the second of our Grandma-magnet vehicles... this time taking us to Taupo to see the lake and, for me, jump out of a plane somewhere over it. After a few cancellations – they only jump if the weather conditions are just so – a fine morning saw me heading out to Taupo airfield. Bearing in mind the sage advice of my mother-in-law (“Now Helen: only jump if you're strapped between a sexy man's legs”), I was pleased to get up close and personal to a tanned, smiling Kiwi guy who told me he'd already done four jumps that morning. We climbed 15 000 ft and I realised that our position in the tiny plane meant only one thing – last one to get in, first to jump out! I can honestly say mild butterflies were the strongest nerves I experienced in the preparation, the climb... and see my smile in the exit photo! - but the feeling of the first few seconds falling through the sky was quite literally beyond terror! I was too frightened to even scream, I could hardly breathe, and I vaguely wondered how the cameraman who had jumped with us expected me to wave, high-five and shake hands... damn that personalised DVD option, it seemed such a good idea on the ground! A few more seconds flailing around and falling at terrifying speed and then – sweet, blessed relief – the parachute went and everything was peaceful. Looking around over the lake and the mountains was just beautiful and I took in every second as we gently floated down, landing effortlessly on a patch of grass the size of the average back garden. Meeting a very relieved James afterwards, I tried and failed to contain the babble of the post-adrenalin high. He was just glad I was ok – I don't think he liked my joke about getting me a bench with one of those engraved plaques on it to go by Lake Taupo, if I had ended up in it.

From Taupo it was down to the very tip of the South Island, to see in New Year in the capital city of Wellington. Putting in some serious miles over New Zealand, it could only be Flight of the Conchords on the CD player, so, singing along with Brett and Jermaine we arrived in Welly, another of those cities that New Zealanders think are busy – 'ooh, mind the traffic... and that one-way system's a nightmare!' - while we looked around at the empty streets and wondered why Kiwis still wait for the green man when the only two cars in sight are parked. Still, it made for a chilled and very enjoyable New Year's, with no queuing, no paying on the door and no standing five deep at the bar. We then experienced a weird sense of satisfaction the following day at 1pm, speaking to both sets of parents just as the UK New Year came in - by then, we were en route to Auckland for the next long haul flight... New Year - done. South America here we come!